But sex during pregnancy can be fulfilling, fun and healthy. Lauren Streicher, associate clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University, wants to clear up two myths concerning a pregnancy that is progressing normally: 1) Sex will not cause a miscarriage; and 2) It’s not going to send you into labor.“If there’s already spotting or bleeding, the doctor might tell you to stop having sex to avoid increasing it, but it’s not going to hurt the baby otherwise,” she says.
“As far as sex starting labor goes, if you have an orgasm, you do get the uterine contractions, but uterine contractions and labor are not the same thing.”There are plenty of other falsehoods floating around.“I think the biggest misconception in our American, white, Western culture is that motherhood and sexuality are not supposed to be linked,” says Kristin Kali, a licensed midwife with Seattle’s MAIA Midwifery and Fertility.
As a dancer, she’s used to being in touch with her body.
Right later so they don’t have to stress about finding Mr. I was trying to get knocked up with anonymous donor sperm. Right in a Vial and was no longer dating to find the biological father for my future child, I didn’t have to stop dating. If I were to bring my date home, there might be lusty groping up the stairs, lips meeting at the landing, stumbling through the door over said cat, shirts unbuttoning, until, “Wait on the couch. I enter the kitchen and turn the lights bright, because it’s hard to fill syringes otherwise. It’s hard not to feel as though my body is broken when it won’t do the thing I thought it would do easily: make a baby.
By my late 30s, I was ready to be a mom, even if solo. If I pick a cafe a short walk from my apartment, my welcoming bed is mere blocks away. Although I know, intellectually, that there’s nothing embarrassing or shameful about needing IVF, my heart reacts differently.
Then, if all goes well, my eggs will be surgically extracted from my ovaries. Not because the restaurant is mediocre and I’d rather be playing fetch with my cat. When I’m finished, about 15 minutes later, I saunter sexily to the couch with a grandma-style hot water bottle over my belly to ensure the meds absorb. But even if I do go on a date during this time, what does that conversation look like? It’s hard not to feel as though there’s something wrong with me, period.
If I were to go on a date during these two-ish weeks, I’d have to keep looking at my phone. “Hey, there, handsome …” If I’m feeling real sassy, I could let him do the honors, this man I just met. Because during an IVF cycle, the follicles in my ovaries grow so big it’s hard to stand up straight. If I were just freezing my eggs, it would leave open the possibility that the date sitting across from me could, one day, fertilize those eggs and become their father. Once my eggs are extracted and fertilized, the embryos will grow in a petri dish to see which ones become most viable.
“The dating during pregnancy thing is tricky because you have to decide what to tell the person you’re seeing.